Anonymous asked: You've been in NYC for a couple months now - what advice would you give to this Chicago girl thinking of making the same move?
I was just thinking about trying to articulate some of the Chicago/NYC differences the other day. So thanks for this, anonymous! I made a little list:
- It’s true — Midwestern people are nice. No offense to those of you raised on the east coast, but there’s just a tangible down-to-earth mentality that I’ve consistently encountered in almost every person I’ve met here who’s originally from the Midwest (there’s a lot of us). We smile at strangers, we say “Excuse me” and “Thank you,” we think of other people. When you grow up thinking everyone does these things, you’re kind of shocked to find out that’s not true. Just be prepared that not everyone does nice things — it’s not because they’re assholes, it’s because we’re actually nice.
- Prepare to work. People here work like dogs — we need to to make our fucking insane rent. While my work day starts later (well actually, we’re supposed to start work at 10 but I’m up much earlier to do two extra assignments I have every day beforehand, OKAY), I have yet to encounter someone who’s regularly out of work before 6:30pm. And it’s not just longer days. The mentality here is “Do your fucking job, do it really well, and if you don’t, there’s a line of people around the block ready and willing to do it for less money.” This means Blackberries, weekend hours, emailing yourself at 11pm to remind you of that thing you had to do tomorrow. In Chicago, when I left work at 4:59pm everyday, I was done until the next day at 9:30am. I never spent one minute outside of that office thinking of anything that was going on in that office. Not the case for anyone I know here. People are HUSTLERS. Maybe it’s the industry I’m in or the fact that I work at a company that a lot of people think they want to work for (MTV), but there’s not a lot of slacking going on in this city.
- Find your respite. Because you are working so much, and espcially if you move here blind, it’s really important to find those little things that bring you calm. This was a tip I learned from my cousin who’s moved a few times as her husband’s in the military. Even though she has a moving buddy built in (seriously gotta wrangle a husband one of these days), you’re still completely restarting your life — new house, new neighborhood, new transportation system, new job, new friends, new gym, new grocery stores, etc. So whether it’s watching House Hunters on the couch on Saturdays for five hours at a time (wait, what?) or it’s yoga (p.s. everyone does yoga here), find something that calms you down. You’re going to feel like you need to see this/do that/drink that/go to this, etc. but you still have to like, not go crazy. This all depends on your age and budget, too. Regardless, don’t feel bad if you don’t go out every single night and see everything you can right away. New York’s not going anywhere. And it’s going to take a while to learn it all anyway. Go at your own pace.
- You will never be cold. Every time I tell someone who’s lived in New York for a while that I’m from Chicago, they look at me like I’m from arctic Russia. People think Chicago is a frozen tundra, which, at times it kind of is. (I see you, Canada, not trying to one-up you.) But New Yorkers are honestly a bunch of pussies when it comes to the weather. Bitches be shivering in down parkas at 45 degrees. I’m serious! 45 degrees! That’s fucking tropical where we come from.
- Free 2 be u and me. The most striking difference I felt when I moved from Chicago to New York, and I’m still really discovering this every day, is the fact that New Yorkers really do not give one shit about anything “weird.” Zero people care about anything you wear/do/say/date/love/hate/work for/cook/eat, etc. NO. ONE. CARES. Which is probably the reason why so many people continue to move here in droves. I remember when I first moved here and asked my gay guy friend where he goes out, “where the gay bars are.” He’s like, “Hon, every bar’s a gay bar.” And it’s true. I go out in Manhattan mostly and from time to time, Brooklyn, but at any given time in the same bar there are gays, straights, goths, preps, old people, young people, azns, hip hop bros, frat guys, models, etc. Melting pot, bro. Melting pot where no one gives one fuck about what’s melting into them. Feels good, man.
- Dating blows. Sorry, sister. Everyone here is an asshole in that regard. The reason people move to New York is because they want the best out of life. They want to test themselves, see if they can make it where it’s the hardest to make it. Same shit’s true in relayshees — people want the best. Sure you can date Dude A, but Dude B, C, and D are equally as appealing. It’s almost like there’s too many options, and they’re all the same/equally great/equallly douchey. IDK, I’m pretty lost in this department. I miss those Chicago bros I would see running along the lakefront in the summer. I never liked them then, but one of those nice guys seems so… warm right now. :-/
- Healthy food options galore! It always blew my mind that the only fucking piece of fruit I could get near my apartment in Chicago was a lame-ass banana from 7-11. There are so many bodegas and shops and cafes here and they all sell the weirdest shit! And it’s healthy. My bodega sells vegan pad thai, and that’s not a rare occurrence (in Manhattan). This seems so normal now that I’ve been here for six months (!!!), but there’s a reason people are fit here — because they demand better food options, and the places they shop supply those options willingly.
- New York is really fucking cool. Listen, New York can be really fucking inconvenient. One thing goes wrong and it throws your whole day off. It’s almost like everything needs to line up perfectly to have a good day in New York because when it shits on you, it fucking diarrheas baby poop in your mouth. It’s kind of hard to understand until you get here. I still wake up confused sometimes, baffled at the fact that I live in New York, a place I’ve wanted to live for as long as I can remember. But the best part is, it’s just like the movies! It has all the vigor, all the shine, all the sparkle, all the movement, all the energy, all the coolness that gets people here in the first place. It truly, honestly, genuinely, lives up to its image and reputation. It’s fun as fuck and the people are unlike any place else. That being said, wear your thickest skin when you get here, but hold on to that Chicago kindness with all your might.
