October 2009
77 posts
-2, Richard Brautigan
poetry365:
Everybody wants to go to bed with everybody else, they’re lined up for blocks, so I’ll go to bed with you. They won’t miss us.
Copy Machine Tech Guy: So, if you click here, you can actually add a text *and* image watermark when you print.
Nicole: Can you add glitter to it?
Everybody’s working for the weekend...
1 tag
Sometimes when you're on the rag...
A construction worker says “Hey babe!” and you smile at him and wave as you’re walking to work and he says “Well ain’t that a beautiful smile” and all you’re thinking is “I’m leaking like a sieve right now.”
So I dated this kid for like, two weeks, a few years ago and I super duper liked him and now he lives in LA and I still look at his Facebook pictures and he’s still dating the same girl he dated after we stopped dating (?) and he was probably the nicest boy I ever dated and then I was a big idiot but then I think I only think he was the nicest boy I ever dated because what goes wrong in two...
Top Chef Thoughts
I just started watching this season. Here’s what’s up:
Eli IS The Critic.
The tattoo guy is kinda hot. Du-uh.
I could never be a judge on this show. My response to everything is, “That looks good.”
“Mayumi confessed that they did it so that the media could slobber all over them...”
– Michael K, RE: Balloon Boy
Conversation at the Victoria's Secret Grand...
Nicole: Excuse me, not to be a creep...
Jillian "The Bachelorette" Harris: No! It's fine!
Nicole: So should I do The Bachelor? Like, what else am I doing?
Jillian "The Bachelorette" Harris: UGGGGHHHH.
Jillian "The Bachelorette" Harris: BUT YOU'D BE SO CUTE ON THERE!
Nicole: I just wanna do it for like an episode and then get kicked off.
Jillian "The Bachelorette" Harris: That's what I thought...
kittensinabasket:
I am very judgmental and I have a lot of problems with just about everything. My masseuse tells me I need to stop being so angry (and stop eating so much cheese and chocolate) because my gall bladder is swollen.
I can’t stop judging everyone and being so fucking angry when people walk around in god damn pajama pants all the fucking time. Fucking rainbow heart, spongebob...
…doesn’t feel bad for you.
If the Asian lady at the flower shop asking me “No boyfriend yet?” upon me purchasing my own flowers (again) isn’t the STORY OF MY FUCKING LIFE, I don’t know what is.
Time Out Chicago names top spots to pick up... →
Three of my favorite places are on this list (don’t judge), The Continental tops it. Excuse me, but duuu-uuuh. Not to be all “How many numbers have I gotten there” but how many numbers have I gotten there*?
*That doesn’t mean we did it! That only happened like once.
“Hey Red!”
– the Streetwise guy
1 tag
The difference is food.
90s Models:
Models Today:
Guys, I have a lot of guilty pleasures:
Three Dave Matthews Band songs
The Jonas Brothers’ “Burnin’ Up”
King of Queens
MySpace Karaoke
Excessive Photo Booth use
Psychics and card readers
Chocolate malts
The worst of all though, I gotta tell you: I WATCH THE CITY AND THE HILLS. Not on TV. ON MY FUCKING COMPUTER. I watch them WITH PURPOSE.
You pretty much know...
Madonna-Whore Complex →
Live it, learn it, let it inhibit every adult relationship you’ve ever been in, love it.
Photographer Vivian Maier's Discovered Work →
Neat for those that like old photos, Chicago, street style, or all of the above.
You know how it’s sometimes hard to meet nice guys in Chicago? Imagine trying to meet them in Los Angeles! GROSS!!!!
I don’t think the ending -gasm should be tacked on to words so williy-nilly: fashiongasm, cargasm, eargasm. There are very few things on the Earth that are actually like orgasms. As great as it is, a sweater isn’t gonna do it for me. Just sayin’.
“They wax your butthole. How cool is that?”
– Monica D.
“Keep it loose, baby.”
– My mom, on dating